Abstract
Families in which there is increased marital conflict after a relatively stable long-term marriage are a puzzle to the clinician. The author's thesis, based on experience with a group of middle-aged couples whose children's differentiation occurred after having been in individual therapy themselves, is that the differentiated child carried special psychic functions for one parent. The differentiation was experienced as tantamount to ego loss, and that parent's attempt to deal with the inner conflict resulted in a marital crisis.